Count Cockula

October 28th, 2009 | researchmaterial

Sarah Deaton just made me look at this AND NOW YOU HAVE TO LOOK AT IT TOO GOD DAMN YOU.

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17 Responses to “Count Cockula”

  1. …what the hell am I looking at?

  2. At least it doesn’t sparkle. Or state that it “retains hot and cold temperature.”, adding “Toss it in the fridge for that authentic experience.”

    This does: http://tantusinc.com/mm5/merchant.mvc?Screen=PROD&Store_Code=TD&Product_Code=VAMP&Category_Code=DI

  3. Now I need something sharp to put my mind’s eye out

    JDC

  4. It’s… a vampire fleshlight… hidden in a tallboy? Dear mother of god the end is now really… really.. nigh..

  5. See this is what you get for the creepy mrs. Mcdonald picture you subjected us to

  6. That video is incredibly misleading.. Also, soft, tiny teeth don’t really lend themselves to the whole Vampire mythos.
    On the other hand, I’ve just found my Halloween costume! Have it!

  7. I saw this a day or two ago, and am pissed that I didn’t send it to you first. Still as horrifying as the first time.

  8. And all of a sudden… I know who I’m going to be for Halloween.

  9. TWILIGHT RUINED FUCKING A POUNDER CAN FULL OF SILICONE GOO!

  10. mmmpppffrrhahahahahaa!
    “mom? i just got daddy’s christmas gift!”

  11. Vampire blowjobs… This can only be win if there is a hidden beartrap–I mean, that’s WHY you’d fantasize about bloodsucking undead, right? To have your vein-filled junk gnawed off…

  12. This is especially funny because I just stumbled on the forgotten ’70s classic film GAYRACULA.

    Yes, GAYRACULA.

    I’ll say it one more time for good measure. GAYRACULA.

    In which he fights his arch enemy, the Marquis de Suede.

    THE MARQUIS DE SUEDE.

  13. I am not at all surprised at seeing this after BUKAKE!

  14. Ah yes, Gayracula. I first saw this film on a 13″ CRT in an artists’ enclave tucked into the mountains of a Cherokee reservation. The firewater was flowing freely and mere minutes before I had been pulled by my Halloween costume into a bathroom to make out with someone whose name or face I never caught.

    The nude dance scene complete with 4th-grade boy farting sound effects is enough to make the purchase of this film worthwhile.

  15. Mmmm…GAYRACULA should make an (re)appearance in WITCH DOCTOR, Brandon.

  16. *points* *laughs*

  17. I call foul play! I’ve had cockula tattooed on my foot for nearly 5 years now! i demand a piece of this pie! if they produce a frankenpussy one too i’m getting a lawyer! exclamation!


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blissblog - 09 Feb 10

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blissblog - 09 Feb 10

Not Even A Secret One

Kieron Gillen - 09 Feb 10

Complete Plan B Archive

Kieron Gillen - 09 Feb 10

The whole run of Plan B magazine has been released as a single 670Mb PDF. That’s 46 issues of some of the finest music writing of the decade. And a lot of posturing pretentiousness too. It’s like two of my favourite things for the price of one. Or none, as it’s a free PDF.

If you’ve any interest in music in the 00s, or music full stop, this is a great thing to just have on file. You’ll discover a new band every time you browse it.

Hell, it’s even worth getting if you’re one of the games journalist sorts. For the first 10-20 issues or so, I was doing games stuff for it. And Quinns and Mathew Kumar too, who I bullied into contributing. Very much written for the non-gamer about games which get pretty much no coverage, we had fun trying to decode the concept of Outsider Games.

Whole thing here. Go gets!

Coilhouse is Hiring! Apply Here.

Coilhouse - 08 Feb 10

Back around the time of Issue 03, we launched the Small Business Advertising Program to create affordable ad space for indie companies in the print version of Coilhouse. By the time Issue 04 rolled around, the number of advertisers had grown significantly – by this time, we had record labels, jewelry and clothing designers, sculptors, other magazines, web hosts, toy makers and graphic designers advertising in our pages. Click here to see them all. With editorial duties taking up more and more of our time as the weeks go by, the moment has come for us to seek help with the advertising side of running the magazine. We’re looking to hire an Ad Manager for our Small Business Advertising Program, starting with Coilhouse Magazine #05… and possibly subsequent issues.

Full details after the jump!


Read the rest of Coilhouse is Hiring! Apply Here.


Post tags: Coilhouse

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blissblog - 08 Feb 10

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blissblog - 08 Feb 10

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blissblog - 08 Feb 10

State of South Carolina Secretary of State Subversive Agent Form

jwz - 08 Feb 10

Check the appropriate box. Do you or your organization directly or indirectly advocate, advise, teach or practice the duty or necessity of controlling, seizing or overthrowing the government of the United States, the state of South Carolina or any political division thereof?
[ ] YES [ ] NO

If yes, please outline the fundamental beliefs. If applicable, attach a copy of the bylaws or minutes of meetings from the last year.

"Inflection Points" Presentation

Open The Future - 08 Feb 10

For those folks who are interested, here's the Slideshare version of the presentation I gave last week at the Earthquake Engineering Research Institute annual meeting. I was asked to talk about foresight thinking, as the event theme was "The Big One of 2056: What Went Right?" a look at a fictional 7.8 quake in the SF region that was handled as well as they could imagine possible.

My goal was to offer a bit of reassurance to the audience that there is some real utility to thinking about the future, and to spell out (in a cursory way) the kinds of big picture issues they should keep in mind while looking ahead forty-six years.

By and large, it was a successful talk. The post-talk questions were engaged, with little push-back, and I'm told that the overall response from the audience was quite positive.

The talk was video recorded, and I'm told will eventually be available to the public. I'll link when that happens.