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Steven Wells Is Dead

The first decent write-up I ever had outside the comics press was written by Steven Wells. And I never got to thank him. And now Steven Wells is dead. And these are his last words:

And of course all this bollocks is written by an idiot who has polished his image as an existentialist, atheist hard-man and anti-mope, forever sneering at the tribes who wallow in self-pity — the gothers, the emo kids, the Smiths fans — the whole 900-block-wide marching band composed entirely of the white male urban middle classes who are convinced that (as the most affluent and pampered human beings who have ever walked the planet) theirs is a story worth hearing. Blissfully unaware that they are but a few generations away from regular visits to the doctor who would wind parasitic worms from their beer bloated assholes using sticks.

You could blame this fallacy on poor education, cultural deterioration, or simple moral decline.

Me? I blame it on sunshine. I blame it on the moonlight. I blame it on the boogie.

Proper fucking writer.

Published in brainjuice


  1. […] Of Letters Last Year’s Girl The Quietus Beard Phawker Happily Stupid John Robb on Facebook Warren Ellis Sex Lies And Audio Tape Swells’ final column Possibly related posts: (automatically […]

  2. James Bong James Bong

    Well, looks like the devil is about to get a thorough ass kicking then, if that Wikipedia biography is anything to go by.

  3. Rob Spalding Rob Spalding

    I have a copy of Tts Out Teenage Terror Totty somewhere.
    It’s the craziest most out there thing I’ve ever read. Makes Crooked Little Vein seem suitable for children by comparison.

    I’ll have to dig it out and read it again in tribute.

  4. Ken Ashcorp Ken Ashcorp

    Warren, I hope you go with out with an incredible song to end your legacy. Just don’t pick anything from the Seventies disco era. Not like that’s going to stop you…
    A terrible shame that you couldn’t thank him before he went. The death of another high class British writer is something to be mourned considerably.

  5. Conspicaracy? Conspicaracy?

    Sounds like some kind of dying breath curse to me.

  6. And those final words will now, sadly, forever be known as a bad Michael Jackson death joke.

  7. Melvin Bradley Melvin Bradley

    Ironic and amusing last words, considering he quoted Michael Jackson, who died today of a heart attack. Heh.

  8. Pete Pete

    I get home drunk, wonder what the hell Warren Ellis is up to, and find out this bloke, who ive never heard of, is dead. First, I naturally couldnt care less, but after reading the quote… Yes. I did care a little more, since I actually care about good writers, which is the first fucking reason I went drunk as hell to in the first place.

    Good night.

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