Darren McGavin Dead
February 26th, 2006 | brainjuice
It’s Not The T-Shirt That Needs Changing
February 26th, 2006 | researchmaterial
Senator Nettle wore the “Mr Abbott get your rosaries off my ovaries” T-shirt earlier this week as the Senate started its emotion-charged debate over who should control the abortion drug RU486.
“It’s not the T-shirt that needs changing, it’s the prime minister’s attitude, which we are seeing increasingly is about bringing fundamentalist religious views into the parliament. Religion has no place in politics, and religion has no place in a decision for a women about what drug is safe for her to use.”
(Found by Rachel Young, thanks)
On Sports TV
February 25th, 2006 | brainjuice
I will never understand why they televise motor racing. It’s duller to watch even than golf. A dozen highly-trained charisma-free planks in high-powered darts that handle like vacuum cleaners drawing a best-fitting line through a boring racetrack fifty times and the same three blokes always win. Give me the cross-country rally any day. I remember watching one where the driver was killing his navigator. The suspension had gone, and the driver was bracing himself against the steering wheel over the bumps and ditches and jumps. But the navigator had nothing to brace against. There was an in-car camera with mic, and you could hear the guy screaming every time the car hit the dirt, until he lost the power of speech entirely, and just laid there, jerking. He had to be carried out of the car by medics at the next stop — because god forbid the driver should pull over or anything. I have a feeling that was the navigator who later died when the driver rolled his car.
Bring back Christians vs Lions, that’s what I say. That’d be some television. Don’t lie to me. You only watch the Winter Olympics to see the skiers wipe out on the downhill slopes. I’d wear that shirt and go to the sports bar.
“I’m a Lions fan!”
“Me too!”
“Have you ever met a Christians fan?”
“Only in Oklahoma and South Dakota. But they say God invented lions anyway, so they’re kind of torn. Which is funny, really, because that’s what happens to the Christians on a Saturday afternoon anyway…”
I should be running a TV network. I would crush the opposition. Also, see them driven before me and hear the lamentation of their women.
“Les Moonves, what is best in life?”
“To crush Jeff Zucker, see him driven before me, and hear the lamentation of his women.” Now that’d be a press conference worth attending. Les Moonves in a loincloth, collar and tie, waving a broadsword stained with the blood of failed sitcoms. Standing on a pile of dead ugly middle-aged Italian guys with inexplicably hot wives.
Send me all the money now.
(x-post/Bad Signal)
[BAD SIGNAL]What Is That Thing In The Sky?
February 25th, 2006 | FeedWordPress
bad signal WARREN It's the sun. We haven't seen that since November. There are blinded people all over Southend today. I will never understand why they televise motor racing. It's duller to watch even than golf. A dozen highly-trained charisma-free planks in high-powered darts that handle like vacuum cleaners drawing a best-fitting line through a boring racetrack fifty times and the same three blokes always win. Give me the cross-country rally any day. I remember watching one where the driver was killing his navigator. The suspension had gone, and the driver was bracing himself against the steering wheel over the bumps and ditches and jumps. But the navigator had nothing to brace against. There was an in-car camera with mic, and you could hear the guy screaming every time the car hit the dirt, until he lost the power of speech entirely, and just laid there, jerking. He had to be carried out of the car by medics at the next stop -- because god forbid the driver should pull over or anything. I have a feeling that was the navigator who later died when the driver rolled his car. Bring back Christians vs Lions, that's what I say. That'd be some television. Don't lie to me. You only watch the Winter Olympics to see the skiers wipe out on the downhill slopes. I'd wear that shirt and go to the sports bar. "I'm a Lions fan!" "Me too!" "Have you ever met a Christians fan?" "Only in Oklahoma and South Dakota. But they say God invented lions anyway, so they're kind of torn. Which is funny, really, because that's what happens to the Christians on a Saturday afternoon anyway..." I should be running a TV network. I would crush the opposition. Also, see them driven before me and hear the lamentation of their women. "Les Moonves, what is best in life?" "To crush Jeff Zucker, see him driven before me, and hear the lamentation of his women." Now that'd be a press conference worth attending. Les Moonves in a loincloth, collar and tie, waving a broadsword stained with the blood of failed sitcoms. Standing on a pile of dead ugly middle-aged Italian guys with inexplicably hot wives. Send me all the money now. --- Sent via mobile device probably in the pub ................... UNSUBSCRIBE: http://www.flirble.org/mailman/listinfo/badsignal
FLUPOCALYPSE: France
February 25th, 2006 | researchmaterial
It is the first time a European Union farm has been infected. France has already had cases in two wild ducks.
K-Hole Feb 2006
February 25th, 2006 | people I know, photography, researchmaterial
My friend Maddie’s down in New Orleans right now, and uploading street photos into this Flickr set. It doesn’t look any better:
Would You Mind Cooking My Penis?
February 25th, 2006 | researchmaterial
When the item in the microwave gave off an unusual odor, the clerk opened the oven door, unwrapped the paper and found what appeared to be a severed human penis.
The clerk immediately called police, but the man who handed the item to the clerk fled from the store on Fifth Avenue…
Fas Ferox: A Modern Day Mythology
February 25th, 2006 | people I know
My friend Anna Young is launching her long-gestating project FAS FEROX today:
Fas Ferox is launching its first issue release at MegaCon today February 24th – 26th! Come look for us at booth 139 located across from the star signature area, in the far left-side aisle.
The first issue of Fas Ferox – a modern day mythology – is an in-depth introduction to Fas Ferox, a multimedia graphic novel with a mythological, sci-fi, cyber theme. In a post-apocalyptic near future, explore the five realms of the universe: Divinity, Spirit, the Physical, Underworld and Dream, while meeting modern manifestations of demigods who walk among us.
This cutting-edge epic is a riveting wake-up call to the archetypes in each and every one of us.
Creative Consultant: Neil Gaiman; Introduction by Neil Gaiman; Author: Jason Stackhouse; Co-Author/Creative Director: James Curcio; Creator/Producer: Anna Young; Associate Producer/Muse: Kal Masunari; Various Artists including: Edson Campos.
Join us on our adventure at the Orlando Convention Center today through
Sunday!
TV SCUM: Weird TV Shows Of The Day
February 24th, 2006 | brainjuice
Found via the TVTracker service:
BET will premiere the first of six episodes of LIL’ KIM: COUNTDOWN TO LOCKDOWN Thursday, March 9, 2006 at 9:30PM. The show chronicles the Queen Bee’s last two weeks of freedom as she ties up her business, says goodbye to friends and makes peace with herself as she emotionally prepares to serve a 366-day prison sentence. In this new half-hour series, BET and production partner Edmonds Entertainment deliver full access to Lil’ Kim’s life and her entourage as she paints the town twenty-four hours a day attending sexy fashion shows, star- studded parties, music video shoots, and glamorous shopping trips. Lil’ Kim then begins the physical transformation to becoming Kimberly Jones, peeling off the ! layers of hair extensions, acrylic nails and stage make-up. Final destination: the penitentiary, where Kimberly turns herself in to authorities. This is Kim’s real life with all of its glamour, drama, comedy and tragedy.
Jenna Jameson is coming to COMEDY CENTRAL! The network will launch its first original animated mobile series “Samurai Love God,” it was announced today by Lou Wallach, senior vice president, original programming and development, COMEDY CENTRAL. The mobile series will premiere in first quarter 2006 and launch cross carriers with eight two-and-a-half minute episodes. COMEDY CENTRAL, which recently unveiled its 2006 original broadband programming slate, has become a trailblazer in the digital content arena. T! he launch of its first original animated mobile series further demonstrates the networks commitment to developing and producing original quality programming exclusively for multi-platforms.
GMF: The United States Of Coathanger
February 24th, 2006 | researchmaterial
Abortion rights advocates across the country reacted with outrage and dismay. The Planned Parenthood Federation of America, which runs the sole abortion clinic in South Dakota, said it was bracing to fight the move in court immediately, if the governor signs it.
Some opponents of abortion rights celebrated what they called a bold and brave move and lauded South Dakota for taking the lead in what they said they hoped would become a series of states to challenge Roe, the 1973 decision that made abortion legal.
The shifting makeup of the U.S. Supreme Court, the opponents said, offered a crucial opportunity, the first since at least 1992.
“It is a calculated risk, to be sure, but I believe it is a fight worth fighting,” State Senator Brock Greenfield, a Republican who is also director of South Dakota Right to Life, told his colleagues in a hushed, packed chamber here.
After more than an hour of fierce and emotional debate, the senators Wednesday rejected exceptions for incest or rape or for the health of a mother and voted, 23-12, to outlaw all abortions, except those to save a mother’s life.
They also rejected an effort to allow South Dakotans to decide the question in a referendum and an effort to prevent state tax dollars from financing what is certain to be a long and expensive court battle.
To be enacted, the bill requires the signature of Governor Mike Rounds, a Republican, who opposes abortion…
[TAGS]grim+meathook+future, GMF, abortion, roe+vs+wade[/TAGS]
Pluto’s New Two Moons
February 24th, 2006 | researchmaterial
The moons were first discovered with Hubble´s Advanced Camera for Surveys in May 2005, but the science team probed even deeper into the Pluto system on Feb. 15, 2006 to look for additional satellites and to characterize the orbits of the moons. In addition to verifying the reality of the moons, the observations also rule out the possibility of other satellites of roughly similar size orbiting Pluto inside the orbits of the two moons. The moons, provisionally designated S/2005 P 1 and S/2005 P 2, are approximately 40,000 and 30,000 miles away from Pluto…
The confirmation reinforces the emerging view that the Kuiper Belt, a swarm of icy bodies encircling the solar system beyond Neptune, may be more complex and dynamic than astronomers once thought. Pluto resides inside the Kuiper Belt and is about 3 billion miles from the Sun. Pluto was discovered in 1930.
The moons’ orbits are in the same plane as the orbit of the much larger satellite Charon (discovered in 1978). This likely means the moons were not captured, but instead were born, along with Charon, in what is commonly theorized to have been a titanic collision between two Pluto-sized objects over 4 billion years ago…
GRIM MEATHOOK WEATHER FORECAST: Another Freak Hurricane Season Due
February 24th, 2006 | researchmaterial
The National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration’s Climate Prediction Center in Camp Springs, Md., told the Pensacola (Fla.,) News Journal it is closely tracking the cool pool of Pacific water that’s far west of South America, affecting weather patterns worldwide, including those in the Atlantic Basin.
Gary Beeler, senior meteorologist with the National Weather Service in Mobile, Ala., told the News Journal: “We’re already in that cycle of busy storms. La Nina means more on top of that. It will mean more storms than normal, but how many I don’t know…”
[BAD SIGNAL]MINISTRY 02
February 23rd, 2006 | FeedWordPress
bad signal MEEEEE Up now at http://www.comicon.com/pulse -- W ................... UNSUBSCRIBE: http://www.flirble.org/mailman/listinfo/badsignal
[BAD SIGNAL]Winter Can Bog Off Now
February 23rd, 2006 | FeedWordPress
bs ME I am so fucking cold I could die. The heating in the pub appears to be broken, the rain is freezing, we've been having bursts of snow and sleet, and, I tell you, it's nasty. There are places where it's colder, places where it's snowier, but Britain leads the world in just basically bloody disgusting weather. Our climate may be more stable than most, but it's just an unpleasant, soul-chewing place to live. And you wonder why Brits are all miserable gits. Need to wrap the next MINISTRY column in the next couple of hours. Using some old notes about webcomics and wrapping them all into a single piece. No idea what the readership is like -- I'm tempted to wrap an HTML clicker into one column to get my own count. And, yes, I'm putting line breaks in again. People on Yahoo and a few other services reported formatting weirdnesses when I dropped the breaks yesterday. So it looks like you'll all have to live with the slim column style emails. Waiting to see how an experimental RSS system reproduces the posts -- I'm working towards eventually having the Signals reprint on warrenelliscom. And if I can get that to work, I hope to cause to have built something that automatically posts on-release dates for my comics, because I always, always forget those... Because I'm senile, yes. Thank you. --- Sent via mobile device probably in the pub ................... UNSUBSCRIBE: http://www.flirble.org/mailman/listinfo/badsignal
The Boy-Piss Vampire
February 23rd, 2006 | researchmaterial
Alan Patton, 54, is in jail after allegedly telling Gahanna police that he enjoys drinking urine. Detective Ron Fithen interviewed Patton after he was arrested while leaving a movie theater last weekend.
“Listening to his describe it, it’s like listening to a crack or cocaine addict. He’s addicted to children’s urine,” Fithen said.
Police said Patton goes to family restaurants and movie theaters and waits for boys in a bathroom stall. Investigators said he shuts off the water to the child-level urinal and puts a cup in the bottom.
Patton allegedly told police that he leaves the stall after the child leaves. “He goes back and retrieves the cup and drinks the urine,” Fithen said.
Police said Patton told them it makes him sick, but that it’s almost spiritual to him. He allegedly added, “I like it because it makes me closer to them — like I’m drinking their youth.”
Police believe Patton has been collecting and drinking urine in cities around Central Ohio, including Hilliard, Westerville, Dublin, Worthington and Gahanna.
