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23 Comments

  1. Yet another bid in my country’s attempt to out-weird Transmet.

  2. For this, we’re all going to hell.

    Which will be fully stocked with the jizz guns.

  3. You’ve gone wrong, Ellis.

  4. “Major pumping required” all right.

  5. Michael Climek

    Michael Climek

    That’s been a meme for a while. The weird little jewish kid that sits across from my desk at work plays it all the time, and emails it to everyone.

  6. Chris

    Chris

    Hahaha, i love their reactions to the messy.

  7. Nick

    Nick

    I need to get one of these before an inevitable recall is issued.

  8. Nick

    Nick

    P.S. god bless america

  9. Scott

    Scott

    They should have named it the “Bukkake Blaster!”

  10. well now todays Diesel Sweeties makes much more sense.

  11. Spubba

    Spubba

    The really gross part is that there’s probably hundreds of pedophiles jerking off to this commercial RIGHT NOW.

    Ew. I think I need a shower.

  12. M. E. Hepler

    M. E. Hepler

    I swear I saw this in a nightmare once. Not mine, someone else’s.

  13. Christopher Holt

    Christopher Holt

    Not only are these hypothetical pedophiles jerking off to the commercial… they’re probably refilling their empty gun’s ooz containers in the process.

  14. MrPerson

    MrPerson

    Having seen it on Diesel Sweeties and Overcompensating, I knew it’d get here eventually.

  15. This is what is wrong with America and why we are loosing the war on terror.
    Rappers drive better armored Hummers than our Army…
    and these weapons are in the hands of children, not with the troops where they belong!

  16. Right in the fucking eye… kids are brought up with no respect these days.

  17. Dear Lord, this commercial was directed by a pedophile, wasn’t it? At least one of those boys takes a shot in the mouth…

  18. Richard Coulson

    Richard Coulson

    When you absolutely, positively, have to kill every mother’ in the room… accept no substitutes.

  19. I want a small hand-held one. To see if I can clear a theatre during love scenes.

    Heh.

  20. Eli Green

    Eli Green

    I work at Toys”R”Us here in Tulsa. We’ve had that video playing on a promo for about two months, and most of us can’t stand to have it on for more than ten seconds. Our manager eventually threatened that if the video was turned off during the day he would write up everyone who was working at the time and fire anyone caught redhanded. So far, I’ve been written up twice, three people have been fired, and two people have quit over the fucking Ejakulator 2500 (they renamed it after it shipped and made us put stickers on it saying “Oozinator”, honest).

    It’s funny that you mentioned Cronenberg since the entire thing is shaped like a hideous giant bug carpace. Anyone see “Naked Lunch”?

  21. Eli Green

    Eli Green

    I work at Toys”R”Us here in Tulsa. We’ve had that video playing on a promo for about two months, and most of us can’t stand to have it on for more than ten seconds. Our manager eventually threatened that if the video was turned off during the day he would write up everyone who was working at the time and fire anyone caught redhanded. So far, I’ve been written up twice, three people have been fired, and two people have quit over the fucking Ejakulator 2500 (they renamed it after it shipped and made us put stickers on it saying “Oozinator”, honest).

    It’s funny that you mentioned Cronenberg since the entire thing is shaped like a hideous giant bug carpace. Anyone see “Naked Lunch”?

  22. ))

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