Terrorist Vagina: We Knew It Would Happen One Day

April 21st, 2006 | researchmaterial

A Salvadoran woman is in some trouble after she allegedly tried to smuggle into the country’s main prison a military grenade and marijuana hidden in her vagina.

The cylinder was about 10 inches long and 4 inches wide. Officials didn’t say what prompted them to check Lidia Alvarado, 44, but authorities have raised the security level at jails across the country, fearing inmates may be planning something. Alvarado was visiting two inmates serving 25 and 30 years when she was arrested. She now faces drug and weapons charges.

Police who inspected the M-67 grenade said it was in working condition.

(Found by Chion Wolf, thanks)


15 Responses to “Terrorist Vagina: We Knew It Would Happen One Day”

  1. Aw, come on, what’s new os surprising about this? Happens all the time in brazilian jails, and I am not kidding you. To the point that they actually conduct cavity searches on people visiting inmates (although I do not know much about that, thankyouverymuch).

    Also, men stick cell phone up their asses, and then use said phones to keep their “buissness” alive out on the street. I imagine they do take the phones out of their asses eventually.
    I think I also remember a news story about some guy’s whore, I mean, wife getting a OD on some random substance she had hidden in her vagina… If I remember correctly she collapsed while waiting to see her guy.

    (Oh, I love being a 3rd world person…)

  2. also, I should learn how to spell “business”.

  3. *pop*

    *KBOOM!*

  4. “Terrorist Vagina” would be a great name for a band.

  5. Get the banjos out, boys.

    Ooooooooooooooooohhh…


    I’m covered in you,
    I’m covered in you.
    From head to toe
    Oh, don’t you know
    Ah’m a’covered in you?

    You said to me “Oh, sweetie,”
    “You’ve really done it now”
    Ah asked you just what did you mean
    And then you went ‘kaplow’


    I’m covered in you,
    I’m covered in you.
    You went kaplow
    What’ll I do now?
    Ah’m a’covered in you!

    I came out with a cock-ring
    But I went in unadorned
    I snagged your special something
    Because I wasn’t warned!


    I’m covered in you,
    I’m covered in you.
    I’m deaf and blind
    I can taste your mind
    Ah’m a’covered in you!

    I never did hear the rest
    Of the crazy plan you’d hatched
    Ah thought the looseness was just your old age —
    Not the greee-nade in your snatch!

  6. Well I have heard of explosive climaxes, but that takes the cake!

    but 10″ long and 4″ wide? Wow. Does she practise with pineapples?

  7. Man…doing her must be like throwing a hot dog down a hallway.

  8. BANG!!!

  9. way to go, mr. struthers. thanks for making this a smiling moment.

  10. A terrorist vagina?
    only 1?
    aren’t they all terrorists in a way?

  11. I imagine it was the walking funny that prompted guards to take a look…

  12. Is that a 10″ by 4″ cylinder of the sticky bud in your pants, or are you just happy to see me?

    sorry, had to be said, or typed rather.

  13. Gives a whole new meaning to the saying, “Dynamite comes in small boxes”.

  14. Makes last week’s South Park episode seem a bit less outlandish.

  15. I am so late getting to this, but my favorite limerick:

    There once was a gal named Alice
    Who used dynamite as a phallus.
    They found her vagina
    In North Carolina
    And the rest of ‘er wound up in Dallas.