SPARKLINE: The Scent Of Falconer

“Crime,” crooned the great detective Falconer. “Its musky discharge is the finest perfume to me. It is all I can do to stop myself from milking the juice of crime from suspects, like rare fragrance from a civet’s glands. Of course, civets carry a variant of SARS, so you can’t really chew on them the way you want to. I miss the days when you could have a good chew on a cat. Also people. Did you know that’s illegal now? There is crime everywhere. Terribly good for the prostate.”

Falconer, amazingly, has never been convicted of any crime.

SPARKLINES: ideas under 100 words. © Warren Ellis 2010

SPARKLINE: Witch Bottle

Contents of bottle: lock of hair, brown, dyed blonde; cinema tickets (2); press-on fingernail, red, cracked, skin residue at tip; condom, used, cleaned, “decorative symbols” drawn on in gold ink; receipt for purchase of flowers, “THIS IS A WARDING SPELL” written on back; scrap of telephone bill envelope with “i really like u kevin” written on (different handwriting to previous); “Zink” photo prints of three recent crime victims, female.

Bottle found: in garden outside flat, label attached reads “STAY AWAY FROM ME I LOVE YOU”

SPARKLINES: ideas under 100 words. © Warren Ellis 2010